Why Do We Continue Destructive Behaviors Despite Our Desperate Desires To Change?
As told by the absolutely brilliant, Dr. Joe Dispenza
I wanted to talk about something that’s very widely felt but barely understood.
For years I’ve personally struggled with certain behaviors and personality traits, even thoughts that were rather miserable to contend with.
The biblical character Apostle Paul said it beautifully in Romans 7:15 when he wrote:
“For what I am doing, I do not understand because what I want to do, this I do not practice, but what I hate, this I do. (Lexham English Bible )
It’s like the biggest fight, the last ultimate war we have to conquer is the war we have of with ourselves.
He goes on to poetically write in chapter 19:
“For the good that I want to do, I do not do but the evil that I do not want to do, this I do. “( LEB)
The question I believe most of us ask ourselves is, why ?
Why do we continue to do the things we know are just horrible for us, even when there’s a desire to change.
It’s Not Enough To Want
So here’s an extremely obvious statement;
it’s not enough to want, even DESIRE to change, and I think you already know this personally.
How many times have you laid in bed at night and thought to yourself, tomorrow will be a better day, only for tomorrow to turn out exactly the same?
How many promises about getting more active, or eating better have you made to yourself that last only about an hour?
How many planners and notebooks are filled in your handwriting with unfinished goals, incomplete tasks, and failed dreams of becoming a better you? (wouldn’t I know all about it)
We promise ourselves every new year that this will be the year we turn it all around; and with our very best intentions, we fail MISERABLY- again and again.
And Will Power Doesn’t Last
Will power is a thing of the past.
Nobody is putting much stock into the supercharged, amped-up, firey energy of willpower anymore.(except for maybe motivational speakers and fitness coaches )
People have realized that willpower only works for a small amount of people for certain circumstances for only a short period of time .
why isn’t willpower that effective in making long-lasting positive changes?
Will-power only deals with external forces but we know the real work takes place inside.( more on this in the next section)
The short answer is, our minds and bodies are like sophisticated computer systems . Any program that does not get downloaded inside of our systems will not stick.
Will power does not download anything inside our computer system it only tries to force our system to perform a certain way.
To change the systems programming, you need the appropriate codes and willpower does not give them to you.
Willpower is only good for short-term purposes, for when you need a little boost in motivation. It is not a long-term resolution for desired behaviors and traits.
What Dr. Joe Dispenza Says:
“You cannot see the way out of a challenge if you are looking at it from the same level of mind, emotions, thoughts, and feelings of the past”.
Dr.Dispenza teaches brain and heart coherence. He argues that a person is either living from the effects of their past or the inspiration of the future.
The problem is, most of our pasts are filled with very limiting beliefs, failures, and regrets, and if we are stuck in that space, we cannot progress or overcome it.
If our minds are too busy reflecting on the pain of the past and our hearts are too busy being stuck there,We will continue to be defined by those same set of circumstances that has stifled us in the past.
On the other hand, if we are moved by a future that has not yet been created, we can imagine more pleasant, new experiences. We leave the space of what has been and move into the space of what can be; or even better yet, what will be.
Who is Dr.Joe Dispenza?
Dr.Joe Dispenza is an author, lecturer, Author, Speaker, Researcher, and Chiropractic Doctor. He holds a bachelor of science degree and has postgraduate training in neuroscience, neuroplasticity, quantitative electroencephalogram(QEEG) measurements, epigenetics, mind-body medicine, and brain and heart coherence.
in simplicity,
Dispenza studies human’s supernatural capabilities from a scientific perspective. Dispenza’s life mission is to help average every day people discover their true hidden power and unlock their full potentail.
Joe looks at the mind and heart‘s’(or thoughts and emotions) connection with our energetic body, and how our mental and emotional state affects the condition of our lives.
Dispenza’s teachings is the outcome of spirituality meeting science and confirming what we already know intuitively. As his site states; he
“demystifies the mystical’”, so that ordinary people have the tools to do extraordinary things.
What Joe Dispenza believes
During one of his interviews at impact theory, he explains just how much our thoughts and emotions contribute to our subconscious behavior and how to stop this cycle that enables us to create lasting changes in our lives.
Like I said earlier, our minds and bodies are like computer programs. And just like any other computer system, our brains are wired to enable us to function the best, with the least amount of energy; we are hardwired to work efficiently.
In theory, there is nothing wrong with our system, the problem is the programming being downloaded itself.
See, most of our unhealthy patterns are created over time by repetition. Once we’ve done something enough times we are then able to do it on autopilot without putting much thought (or energy) behind it. Our system allows us to automatically recreate the same process without being cognitively involved with it.
The problem…
The problem is our minds do not distinguish between unhealthy automatic processes and healthy processes. Most of the stuff we think and do automatically is of low vibrations.
And because we fall in the cycle of low vibrational thought patterns, we then develop low vibrational emotions which then cause low vibrational circumstances.
It’s the cycle we get stuck in
But one day, let’s say we get tired of the way things have been, so we say to ourselves we want better. We compile a list of things we will change and have a very well intention to do so.
But because it’s not yet stored in our unconscious program it doesn’t stick, we go back to our same unhealthy patterns of thought, then emotion, then circumstances.
Dispenza tells us that we draw more negative energy towards ourselves by negative subconscious processing. We use our systems (that are built for ease and efficiency) to draw to ourselves negative outcomes with ease and efficiency; our effective programming becoming our demise.
Using the law of attraction to explain this a little further
Where our thoughts go, energy flows. So when we get used to automatically looking at our negative circumstances, we then in turn draw more of those same negative circumstances to us.
Emotions are energy in motion so when our emotions are low we are driving those low emotions out into the universe to send for us more of those same emotions.
Our behaviors become trapped in this cycle of low/negative thoughts becoming low negative emotions becoming low/negative circumstances which then creates more low/negative thinking.
Because of this consistent ongoing pattern we trap ourselves in,
We have now coded this behavior into our subconscious program so that now most of it is happening subconsciously, without our awareness or effort.
And that’s the heart of Dr. Dispenza’s message
Once a vicious cycle becomes trapped in the subconscious mind as automatic programming, we are then creating our lives, thoughts, patterns, and behaviors effortlessly-which we were designed to do in the first place , good or bad.
Once we become unhappy with our lives, we try to abruptly change the system by forcing new behaviors. But one out of wack circumstance and we are back to the same system.
We are back to the same behaviors that caused us the circumstances by which we hate. We are trapped in a cycle by which we feel we cannot escape.
What does Dr. Joe Suggest?
It starts with awareness.
By you reading this right now you have become aware of your subconscious programming hardwired into your mental and physical system. By simple awareness (or mindfulness as some like to call it) You can begin shifting it.
He says once you become aware you can start to transform those negative low vibrational thoughts. By transforming your thoughts you will then transform your emotions. Once your emotions are higher, you will automatically draw better circumstances to yourself.
In other words, you’ll change your subconscious wiring.
Now there is so much more in-depth we can go with this, what I’ve said is barely the tip of the iceberg. But applying what you’ve learned so far can dramatically improve your chances of true change. So here’s how it works in list form:
- Notice your negative low vibrational thought process
- Detach yourself from those thoughts, become the observer of your emotions like you are a scientist, unbiasedly contemplating what you are experiencing without personalizing anything directly.
- I find it easier to do this by naming my emotions. A wise man once said, “if you can name it, you can tame it). Naming the things you are feeling helps you to get to the root of the trigger, and lets you properly understand and release instead of staying in that space. Example; I’m frustrated because of such and such, I understand this is a result of my past and not based on any current threat so with that I will move past this. (It’s hard at first but it gets easier)
- Once you become aware of your internal processing, you become more responsible for your emotions and no longer allow outside circumstances to dictate your inside processing. You then chose what you allow to emotionally move you ( and with that, you can choose only high vibrational uplifting things to move you)
- Your mood elevates and you now allow space for transformation. You are rewiring your mind to allow for new habits to form, new thought patterns, and behaviors.
- With new thought processing, comes new emotions which bring new behaviors which lead to better circumstances and opportunities in your life. You will be drawing to your higher energies which will continue to improve your thoughts and subsequently your moods.
You’ve successfully changed the cycle.
All that was explained is getting down to one point; changing the cycle from low vibrational thoughts, feelings, actions, circumstances to higher vibrational; thoughts, feelings, actions, circumstances.
By following what you just learned, you will be able to change an undesired behavior and thus change your life.
Understand that with anything, it will be hard at first because of your pre-conditioned hard wiring already set up within you. When something new arises, your subconscious mind and body will be like” what is this, this is new, we don’t understand “.
When you used to be in a negative frame of mind you will subconsciously anticipate that. So when you go to do things differently, it will feel awkward.
You’re going to want to go back to your old negative thought patterns to continue the cycles you were used to.
That is why it’s critical to become aware, make the subconscious conscious, and that’s when the true change can begin.
Unless it gets in the subconscious mind by awareness, along with the constant shifting of thoughts repeatedly, it will not stick, your body and mind will work together to through it out because it doesn’t fit the programming.
You’ve got to make it stick inside the subconscious program, and this is exactly what Joe Dispenza teaches in his workshops.
Change your mind you change your life
Joe Dispenza says we are so powerful and are capable of doing so much, more than we understand.
I get life happens, and there are just some things that cause us mental distress but don’t stay in that space. It’s hard to swim up to shore when we are anchored to the bottom of the ocean.
Likewise, it’s hard to rise above our unwanted circumstances, when we are looking at them from the same eyes we had when we attracted those circumstances, to begin with.
An elevated life calls for an elevated way of thinking.
It’s so hard to let go of the things that have hurt us or caused us distress, but when we let them go and chose to elevate our emotional responses, we allow ourselves the space and opportunities to become far greater than what we’ve been through.
I’m a living testimony of this. For almost ten years, I held on to so much pain and hurt of those who have wronged me in the past. I didn’t want to let go because I thought somehow by letting go I was excusing the bad behaviors of others. One day I realized I was the one causing my demise,
I wasn’t suffering because of what happened to me but because of my inability to let go of what happened to me.
So holding grudges became undesirable habits of mine that were so hard to break. Once I did release it, I was able to create a much healthier way of dealing with people who wrong me, my emotions elevated, I was able to raise my vibration and I have had so much peace, joy, and loving synchronicities because of it.
Joe Dispenza says:
If you want a new outcome, you will have to break the habit of being yourself, and reinvent a new self
